When Pam & Tommy was released on Hulu, Pamela Anderson wasn’t among those watching, unhappy to see her trauma serving as material for others to make money from even after all these years. Specifically, the Hulu series focuses on the theft and release of intimate videos made by Anderson and then-husband, Tommy Lee. Lily James plays Anderson in the limited series alongside Sebastian Stan as the Mötley Crüe drummer.

In a new interview with the New York Times, Anderson commented on how James sent her a handwritten letter about her Pam & Tommy involvement when she got the role. While James is complimentary in the letter, explaining how she wants to “honor” Anderson with the portrayal, it still has yet to be read by its intended recipient. Even now, a “scanned copy of that letter still sits in Ms. Anderson’s inbox somewhere, unread.” For Anderson, she can’t read the letter as she was not interested in revisiting the trauma she endured “the first time” it happened in the 1990s.

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“It was already hurtful enough the first time,” Anderson explains. “It’s like one of those things where you’re going, ‘Really?’ People are still capitalizing off that thing?”

Pamela Anderson Tells Her Side of the Story

     Netflix

Anderson also explained that she has resisted continuous offers for years to participate in new projects based on her life story. Perhaps feeling uncomfortable with how scripted shows like Pam & Tommy could change public perception of the situation, Anderson has since sought to tell her story from her own point of view. This includes releasing a memoir, dubbed Love, Pamela. She is also participating in a new Netflix documentary, Pamela, a love story, which arrives this month. A recently-released trailer has Anderson seemingly commenting on Pam & Tommy.

“I blocked that stolen tape out of my life in order to survive and now that it’s all coming up again, I feel sick. I want to take control of the narrative for the first time,” Anderson says in the trailer.

“Nobody knew the truth — even I don’t know 100 percent of what happened, but I think what is most important is to share my human feelings and how much it hurt and how it undeniably defined me moving forward — in my career and my relationships,” Anderson said in a previous statement to Vanity Fair.

“I was very hesitant, but looking back, I feel empowered,” Anderson also told Netflix about how she feels upon doing the new doc. “And I hope that [my story] inspires people to have a great f***ing time and not worry so much.”

Pamela, a love story will be released on Netflix on Jan. 31, 2023.